Jingle balls.

Hello.

   Just a month to go and we are already fed up of Christmas. From shite adverts dropping before we have time to blow out the candles in our pumpkins to today, Black Friday (yes, their lives matter), we have been pickled in Christmas cheer. And still it is a month away. Fake Santas are everywhere, and children have already written their lists, on the assumption that their behaviour in the next four weeks will not influence Santa's final decision on what they will receive - little do they know.

   But maybe the fact if a child is naughty or nice doesn't matter anymore if we are to take the advice of psychologist professor Boyle and his mate, social scientist Dr. McKay. They claim that feeding children the ol' Santa story undermines a child's trust and is morally suspect. Their opinion is that we need to stop pretending that good, old Nicholas brings presents. Santa Claus is a figment of our imagination (based on a 4th century Saint from Asia Minor) and imaginative children will have greater creative tendencies in adulthood and, perhaps more curiously, helps them cope with pain better. But who needs creative people when we can have more bankers and politicians? I think Boyle & McKay are on to something.

   After reading their paper I decided to look for things that we should tell our children about and discovered that some dudes in Australia reckon 8-year-olds need to be "porn literate". So, first they want to take Santa from the kids and, now, they want to take away the joy of seeing porn for the first time, which is the rite of passage for any teenage boy.

   In any case, to really confuse my 8-year-old nephew I will be getting him a DVD this Christmas: Santa Claus is cumming to town. That should fuck him right up and so what, because in the end...

...it's all a load of Bovine Skittles!


Sources
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/science/2016/11/24/parents-urged-stop-pretending-father-christmas-real/
http://mezo.me/news/news/8-year-old-children-should-be-taught-about-porn-melbourne-university-researchers-say?uid=53404
http://www.futurity.org/imagination-helps-kids-cope-with-pain/
http://www.ideastogo.com/the-science-of-imagination